In this episode, Steve Fretzin and Blaine Oelkers discuss:
- The power of Selfluence.
- Build your firm with what matters most to you in mind.
- The 30-minute hour and how time compression works.
- Single-tasking, multitasking, and batch-tasking.
Key Takeaways:
- The easiest thing to control is you.
- The use of your time and the habits you create will determine where you end up in life.
- What you decide to focus on creates your reality.
- Goals are there to motivate you, not to be a deadline of disappointment.
“The day before vacation, people are three to 10 times more productive and it boils down to three things: PDF. PDF stands for plan, delegate, focus.” — Blaine Oelkers
Connect with Blaine Oelkers:
Website: http://selfluence.com/
TEDx Talk: http://www.blainetedx.com/
Book: http://www.masteringtgr.com/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/blaineoelkers/
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Connect with Steve Fretzin:
LinkedIn: Steve Fretzin
Twitter: @stevefretzin
Facebook: Fretzin, Inc.
Website: Fretzin.com
Email: Steve@Fretzin.com
Book: The Ambitious Attorney: Your Guide to Doubling or Even Tripling Your Book of Business and more!
YouTube: Steve Fretzin
Call Steve directly at 847-602-6911
Show notes by Podcastologist Chelsea Taylor-Sturkie
Audio production by Turnkey Podcast Productions. You’re the expert. Your podcast will prove it.
FULL TRANSCRIPT
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
people, attorneys, blaine, lawyer, business, book, helping, thinking, read, vacation, day, steve, talk, habits, year, minute, moment, practice, car, listening
SPEAKERS
Blaine Oelkers, Narrator, Stephanie Vaughn Jones, Steve Fretzin, Jordan Ostroff
Blaine Oelkers [00:00]
Okay, so do you know what PDF stands for?
Steve Fretzin [00:03]
Ya know,
Blaine Oelkers [00:05]
it stands for portable document format from anywhere, but that’s not what it is for us. For us PDF stands for plan, Delegate focus.
Narrator [00:19]
You’re listening to be that lawyer, life changing strategies and resources for growing a successful law practice. Each episode, your host, author and lawyer coach, Steve Fretzin, will take a deeper dive helping you grow your law practice in less time with greater results. Now, here’s your host, Steve Fretzin.
Steve Fretzin [00:41]
Hey, everybody, welcome to be that lawyer. I am your host, Steve Fretzin, as the announcer mentioned, and I hope you’re having a lovely day, we want to take some time to really take a breath and really appreciate what we have in this world, whether that’s family whether that’s time away, whether that’s just a beautiful day. I know we get caught in the billable hour, I know we get caught on a sort of feels like a roller coaster ride that we can’t get off. But hopefully you’re listening to the show while you’re walking your dog or you’re taking you know, you’re taking a walk or something in driving in your car. And you can really just take a moment to appreciate things and in just take some time for yourself. I think that’s really important. And we’re gonna have a really great conversation. I got Blaine in the wings Hayden Blaine. Hey, I’m
[01:23]
doing great. Thank you so much for having me on Steve. Yeah, absolutely. I’m
Steve Fretzin [01:26]
so excited to introduce you and have just a really aggressive filling, fun, energetic conversation. I know that’s where we’re gonna go. I mean, you and I met for our pre interview was like two peas in a pod. And I, I feel like we had a lot more we could have talked about and hopefully we’re gonna, we’re gonna have to hash out some of that on the show. And then maybe afterward as well. Have to take a moment to thank our wonderful sponsors, we’ve got practice Panther money, Penny, and legalese, all helping lawyers to be more efficient with their time, get stuff done. And when you are so kind to send me a quote of the show, and I’ll read it and then you can explain what it means and why it was meaningful to you. When you argue for your limitations. You get to keep them and that’s Gary Keller. So what is that all about?
[02:11]
Yes, yes. First of all, thank you for having me on.
Steve Fretzin [02:13]
Thanks for being here.
[02:14]
Yeah, you and I were a little weird, in that we both have this kind of a love affair with attorneys, right. And so both of us, it’s perverted. You know, we love you attorneys. I often tell my friends I say I love working with attorneys, and they give me this look, and I said, No, no, no way. There are entrepreneurial, collaborative, ambitious, intelligent, super nice attorneys out there. And there are and we love serving them. So we do have that, that weirdness together. But that quote, you know, when you argue for your limitations, you get to keep them and when I first heard that, quote, it kind of changed me forever, and I couldn’t unlearn it. Like once you hear it, forget about it. So what you realize is what I first realized was, I was arguing for my own limitations. Like I was arguing like, I’m too this I’m too that I can’t do this. I can’t do that. You know, I started the year I’d only been on eight podcasts and and I’m arguing for my limitations. I can’t do podcasts. I might not be good. That added up. This year. I’ve been on 70 podcast, right? And so so don’t argue for your limitations. But when you do you get to keep them now the first thing is I saw to myself, but then I start seeing it in my teammates, get my clients, and we all start calling each other out. Right. So now people are like, Blaine, that that sounds like you’re arguing for your limitations. And it becomes a lot of fun. But it’s all in pursuit of mastery. It’s all in pursuit of you getting better. And so watch out, watch out, watch yourself, watch your language and stop arguing for those limitations.
Steve Fretzin [03:39]
Awesome, man. I love that and Blaine Alkermes. You’re the founder of self fluence. And I’d love to have you share your background and also as long as we’re going there. That’s a cool term self fluence. I’d love to hear a how you came up with it and be what does it mean? And what does that you know, that’s just an interesting way to combine some words.
[03:58]
Yeah, yeah. So if you’re going to start a business make up a new word. That’s my feedback. So it’s a combination of self and influence. And so over the last maybe 20 years, my expertise has come in what I call personal implementation, how to get yourself to do more the things you want to do, right, so it’s kind of the art and science of influencing yourself. And the other thing I’d like to say about it is self fluence. I often say we’re powered by self fluence, but it’s the power you already have to influence yourself. You don’t need anything new. There’s no new software needed up there. You know how to do it. It’s self evident. You’re just not doing those things. And there’s a lot of ways you can do some mind hacks and other things to help you get there. But but it’s the power you already have to influence yourself. And that’s where I found for most people, that’s where the greatest power was. You control yourself more than you control other people. And so it was I think it was 2009 I started a company, you know that that started helping people and training people on basically personal implementation how to how to get yourself to do more stuff, how to get yourself to create new habits, eliminate bad ones, you know, crushed the to do list and, and a lot of different things like that. So that’s where it came from. And for me, it started to grow, because I realized, like, that’s kind of why I’m on the planet. I’m on the planet to help people take control of their lives by taking control of themselves. And that’s what I love to do. And it even passes. You know, Steven even passes what I call the Powerball test. So the Powerball test is if you won the Powerball lottery, right, it’s like $500 million. Sometimes it’s a billion dollars. Yeah, right. It’s getting up there. Yeah, it gets up there. You know, if I, if I won that, right. And I tell people if you won that Powerball, and then you know, a year later, like you did all the partying, you bought the castles, the cars, the trips, you did it all you set up the trust funds, you did all that it’s a year later, you still got a couple 100 million dollars in the bank, what would you do? And when I asked that people in a workshop, nine out of 10, people say I would help people blank. Like it’s all about helping people give it back. But but for me, the Powerball test is let’s say I won the Powerball last Saturday, I’d still be here. Now, it may look a little different. I might have bought you a new car. But you know, I would still be here doing this because it passes the Powerball test. For me, it’s what I want to do. It’s what I feel like I’ve been called to do, and a lot of attorneys that is that way, like they’re passionate about their craft. Now sometimes, you know, they don’t have enough business knowledge. And thanks to you, they get some of that. But but you know, that’s, that’s where we’re at life really starts to, I think be exciting.
Steve Fretzin [06:26]
Yeah. I mean, when I talked to attorneys about working with me, just as an example, they think they’re paying me, you know, this this fee, and it’s like, I’m getting in, they’re not getting anything, and I go, No, no, you’re you’re investing in you. I’m the conduit for where you’re going to learn business development, best habits and, and methodologies. But ultimately, you’re you’re putting that money back in you, you just don’t realize it because I’m actually taking the check. So, but but that’s, that’s the thing. It’s all about the self. It’s all about what what can you control? What can you do to improve your situation, and not point fingers and not try to handle things that are out of your control, which, you know, people always try to do, and that’s what drives people nuts is when they can’t control things he can control you.
[07:10]
Right? Right. That’s the easiest one to control as you now.
Steve Fretzin [07:14]
So I’ve got a new segment. Blaine, I kind of hit you up with this before we started today. It’s called the B that lawyer moment. And that’s what was the tipping point changing point, a point in your career where maybe things weren’t going so great. And then you had this aha moment? Or maybe that’s what I’ll call it the aha moment. I’m
[07:32]
still coming up with titles, I think. But what’s something that happened for you that really made me things? kind of click? Yeah, this is a great question. And a great thing for people to share. Jim Rohn calls it the day that turns your life around, right. And for Jim Rohn, it was this time where he lied to a Girl Scout, he didn’t have $2 to buy the cookies, you know, and he lied and said he bought them before. But anyway, he said never again. But for me, that moment came I was working a corporate job. And I was on a business trip. And I came back from this business trip. And my son Bo he was one year old at the time. And I got back was kind of a lengthy business trip. And I got back and I came back. And he’s actually a little weird, right? He’s kind of like, give me the cold shoulder like, like, you know, and so I asked my wife, Beth is what’s going on with Bo, like, what’s wrong? What happened while I was gone, since well, nothing happened while you were gone. But you were gone so long. He kind of forgot who you were. And in that moment, I was like, Wait a second, then all these memories of both my kids. Both my parents work. So a lot of times I came home to an empty house, my my brother wasn’t there. And all this stuff flooded my memory. And it was that moment I made this was my be the lawyer moment or whatever it is, I made a clarifying decision that night that no matter what I was going to work from home, I was that was never going to happen to me again. And so it took me a year I started two businesses. It was very tough on our marriage there. We had another child on the way. I’m running two businesses and my regular job. But a year later, I was making more from what we might call today a side hustle. But I was making more from my other business than I wasn’t my job. And then my wife said, Okay, we got enough money in the bank, you can leave. And so I left that job. And that was 27 years ago. So for 27 years, now the kids are grown and gone and out of the nest. But I was at work from home dad, I was the coach of the soccer team. I was helping coach the tennis team, I’m at the bus stop whatever, I’m always there, I’m always around. And but what it did also for me, is it gave me the bandwidth to be able to dig into what I really liked. So I had businesses that had no daily operations on my part. So I had the bandwidth to do the self development. I had the bandwidth to figure out what are the frameworks that help people get more stuff done, you know, and that’s really what then kind of self fluence kind of came out of so it had its its birthing there but that that cold shoulder changed my life.
Steve Fretzin [09:42]
Yeah, we need we need to get sort of knocked down to get up again in a different way. And we all have our stories and that’s why I’m gonna keep trying to pull those stories out of out of guests today with you and then moving forward because I think that people want to be inspired and people want to hear that they’re not alone in getting pushed around or beat down. A few things that happened to us in life. And I’ve certainly had my, you know, my ups and downs literally and figuratively. So I totally get it. So thanks for sharing that. And one of the things that I was really intrigued by with self fluence and just looking at your LinkedIn profile, and kind of going through and talking with you is how effective you are at helping people with time and habits. So I really wanted to see if we could get some nuggets, because that’s where lawyers struggle every single day is around time management and building better habits. So what why, first of all, why are lawyers in particular so bad? At time management? Why is that just like the thing that they all seem to sort of struggle with?
[10:38]
Well, so for the attorney, right, I mean, you attorneys, you know, you have a certain mindset, and then you go to college, and you go to law school, and over and over and over, you’re taught right to to find the mistake, you know, to find the thing, that that’s wrong to argue for things. And it’s funny how one attorney told me, you know, that his kids, something was happening with his kid, and all of a sudden, he started talking like it was a court case, and he was the judge, and you’re taught all this at a very young age. So you’re taught to be meticulous about things like that. And then you’re also taught that it’s all about the billable hour, in some cases, many, many practice areas are about the billable hours. So there’s this kind of almost overemphasis, you know, on time. And I think the other thing is, there’s not a lot of training on this stuff, right? There’s not a lot of business training, and even in high school and college, you know, there’s not a lot of training on like, how to run yourself right now. Like, where’s the transformer, your personal implementation, not a single class on that, how to run yourself, not a single class on that, you know, so I think that that’s some of this stuff has to be, you know, you have to learn from the outside or from podcasts like this, you’ve got to dig in, and you’ve got to learn some of that stuff. Because that’s going to determine your use of your time. And the habits you create, those two things are going to determine where you end up in life.
Steve Fretzin [11:59]
Someone could make millions and it’s not going to be me and probably not going to be you teaching high schoolers how to manage their time, my high schooler does, he’s on his phone all the time. Not using it for managing his time just using it for wasting his time. Right watching crap. So I just can’t believe like how much better our kids would be if they had a course a class even like a seminar on time management and building strong habits. I don’t know why that isn’t being done. Somebody’s been making a fortune, but not me.
[12:29]
I know. It’ll be our side. That’s gonna be a side project. Let’s do it, man. Yeah, but it’s gonna have to be it’s probably gonna have to be disguised in some other course name that will get them to enroll right you know so so you know how to be suave on your phone or how to you know, what we’re you know, some other thing that you you embed those teachings inside, but I think we can do it. We’re up to the challenge, for sure. And you get all the attorneys once we train all the attorneys up then then after that,
Steve Fretzin [12:56]
I’ll tell you what, that could be something right there. And if anybody’s listening to this, do not take that idea of bland and ironic. We’ve already trademarked Okay, I’m gonna get rid of our trademark. Yeah, we got a trademark attorney on it right now. He’s already in the works. So as a listener of this podcast, I hope you’ve learned some valuable lessons when it comes to not just managing your firm but helping it thrive. Practice Panther the all in one legal practice management software is designed to help you do just that. It has powerful reporting that gives you real time feedback on the health of your firm and its finances. automated workflows that free up your schedule while keeping your cases on track, and tons of native feature like E signature and two way texting that keeps your clients happy and informed. With practice Panther you don’t have to do it all by yourself. Get a free demo at practice panther.com/v That lawyer to receive 10% off your first year.
Jordan Ostroff [13:48]
legalese marketing is not your traditional marketing vendor. Instead, we’re a true fractional cmo that helps you save time and spend your money the right way to build a practice of your dreams. We helped through the entire process from customizing your intake system to driving leads, and even getting more reviews afterwards, schedule your free call at legalese marketing.com.
Steve Fretzin [14:11]
Hey Steph, tell everyone what mani pedi does for law firms
Stephanie Vaughn Jones [14:14]
where the call handling and live chat experts and Moneypenny receptionist can ensure that your calls are directed to the right person seamlessly saving you time and money. Steve, did you know that 69% of people don’t like to leave a voicemail.
Steve Fretzin [14:28]
I did not know that. That’s a lot of business going away right there. Let’s cut to the chase. What are you prepared to do for my listeners?
Stephanie Vaughn Jones [14:34]
We’re offering an exclusive two week free trial. If you’re interested in hearing more, you can call me directly on 470-534-8846 and mentioned that you’ve heard this ad on Steve’s podcast.
Steve Fretzin [14:48]
Very cool. Thanks. All right. So let’s get into time and let’s get into habits. What are one or two tips on best practices for time management and then one or two tips for establishing better habits for controlling a day or it versus letting it control you.
[15:06]
Yeah, yeah. So one last thing on the trademark, though, I will say, Don’t Don’t underestimate that. Because I started people started call me the chief results officer. Yeah. So I went to the US Patent and Trademark Office, and I applied myself couple 100 bucks, but I’d recommend using an attorney, make sure it’s done right. Yeah, but I got that I got the registered trademark, they are with the circle. So I am America’s only chief results officer, you have to license it through me if you want to do it. I’ve had to send a few letters out here and there, but not not many, but not many. But anyway, when you come up with something, and it’s a good name, and it’s not being used, you know, do that maybe even in your practice area, you know, trademark something. Okay, back to time. Alright, so I have a framework, which I want to teach everybody right now. It’s called the 30 minute power. So the 30 minutes, so it’s how to get an hour’s worth of stuff done in just 30 minutes. Okay, so you’re at, you’re literally compressing time. compressing time, right. And so Alright, So Steve, I’m gonna it’s a little bit of a quiz here. And you may get this you may, you may get the right answer. But there’s a day sometimes it’s more than once a year. But there’s a day, once a year, that’s the most productive day of the year for attorneys and for everybody. And during that day, people are three to 10 times more productive than an ordinary day. Now that’s 3x to 10x. We’re only looking for 2x. Right? Do you know what day of the year that is? And it’s the same day for everybody? It’s the same day forever. It’s not like a day of the week or certain calendar day. All right, I’m totally guessing at this but New Year’s Day, New Year’s Day, that’s a productive day, but a lot of people are hung over on that. It’s a productive day Halloween. So when I What’s that Halloween? No, that’s too scary. That’s not a good day for most people. They’re getting ready for the goblins in the candy and the sugar. Maybe the day after Halloween know this is going to be very intuitive for you. And remember what I said earlier about self launch the power you already have to do this, right? Like you already know how to be super productive. Why? Because the 30 minute when you hit here the 30 minute or I want you to think of this the day before
Steve Fretzin [17:05]
vacation? Ah, the day before vacate. That’s not the same day for everybody. No, everybody has that everybody. Okay? Then I would have guessed birthday. Okay, well, that’s definitely not.
[17:17]
It happens at different times. But the day before vacation, people are three to 10 times more productive. And I came a little acronym, because why they’re so productive. It boils down to three things called PDF. Now PDF. If you’re if you’re in the tech world, you know, say email me that PDF or PDF. It’s easy to remember. Yeah. Okay, so do you know what PDF stands for? And,
Steve Fretzin [17:39]
ya know, it stands for
[17:41]
portable document format, from anywhere, but that’s not what it is for us. For us. PDF stands for plan, Delegate focus. Alright, so let me just unpack real quick planning the day before vacation. Listen, you do this next day planning you like plan out the day down to the minute, if you will do that you will have 30 minute hours. All right. So so plan out your day is key. Typically, they before vacation, which is I’ve studied this day, because it’s so awesome. From a result standpoint, people typically get up 30 to 60 minutes earlier. So if you wake up 30 minutes earlier, boom, you got a 30 minute hour immediately because you got 30 extra minutes. They also have a clear vision when they plan and then they use the 8020 rule. What I mean by that is you everyone says oh yeah, I understand the 8020 rule, I believe it well, that means that 20% of what you do produces 80% of your results. So they focus in on the 20 and the outs the eight right so that’s planning delegating is just about on the day before vacation when you think you have to do something you think who before do that’s my little saying who Oh, I love that. Who before do do who can do this before you go do this. And you’re just like deferring and delegating stuff like there’s no tomorrow. So so be open to delegation. And the last part, which is the most powerful for me personally, and that’s what’s planned delegate focus. Now on the day before vacation, you have this like weird, fierce focus, right? Think of all the things you don’t do. No chitchat, no chasing shiny objects, no water, cooler chatter, you are on fire, you’re on purpose, and you’re ready to go. Yeah, bring some of that back. Now not maybe not the stress of all that, but but bring back the productivity in that. The other thing is like GG, you know, the very first James Bond movie came out and I think 60
Steve Fretzin [19:21]
You’re killing me with all these questions. Holy mackerel. I’ve got it in my head because it’s a James Bond that no one knows. Right? It’s a dagger that no one
[19:31]
ever remember? I don’t remember the actor. I just know the movie. I’ll give it to you. Yeah, I’m short on time. It’s Doctor No. So what happens?
Steve Fretzin [19:39]
Okay, that wasn’t with Sean Connery though. Didn’t Sean Connery do doctor? No.
[19:43]
I’m not sure it was the very first one. But here’s what here’s my point for the doctor. No. Is that on the day before vacation? People say blank. Can you do this? Can you do that? I’m like, no, no, no, no, no. You become Doctor No. And that needs to be your default answer not only to have 30 minute hours, but to have one Wait 90 minute hours. So the 90 Minute hours were some friend or some associate says, Could you help me with this for an hour and it takes 90 minutes happens all the time, more time than you think you also your focus allows you to stay on schedule, you use timers, the day before vacation when I studied those people, they also become masters masterful at tasking. And there’s three types of tasking, single tasking, multitasking and batch testing. Now, single tasking, that’s my that’s where I get the most 30 minute hours. And what single tasking is, is you focusing on just one thing completely. With no outside interruptions. For example, I write a lot of articles. So if I want to get an hour’s worth of article writing done in 30 minutes, I will turn off the phone go into airplane mode, shut the door, only open the screen, I’m typing in no distractions, no rings, dings or beings. And I can get 30 minutes of focused work. Now sometimes you a little monkey mind in there. So you have a piece of paper, write down ideas, capture it, but don’t spend time on it. But do that that one thing completely. That gives me the most 30 minute hours. And on the day before vacation. That’s the way people operate. Like, don’t bother me, I have to finish this. I only have 10 minutes.
Steve Fretzin [21:06]
Yeah, I’m good. We’re heading off, we got the passports, everything’s everything’s packed. Get out of my way.
[21:11]
Right. So that’s single tasking. Multitasking is when sometimes it gets a bad rap when you could do two things at the same time without sacrificing the quality of either one. So for example, I have a hands free car phone, I can drive my car, you know, and talk to somebody on the phone and drive my car, right. So do a toothache or I can exercise and listen to your great podcast right? Wherever you can do two things at once you try to get that synergy I used to love. I love family time. Now the kids are gone. But I love to exercise. So we taught everybody to play tennis. And now we go out, we go out for 30 minutes of tennis and family time. Well, there was a 30 minute out right there. So that’s multitasking. And the last one is batch tasking. So bad. Sass is where you batch things together right up batch, all your phone calls together much more productive batch all your computer work together, much more batch all your errands together day before vacation, people get real efficient about gallon going out and running errands. And then the last thing is they tend to batch their interruptions, which I love. So for example, if someone’s the day before vacation, they don’t want people bothering them for their two hours of single focus time. So say look from nine to 11. I’m working on this stuff. I’m working on these cases, okay, I’ve got to get these cases filed at 11 o’clock, from 11 to 1120. We can meet you can ask me all the questions you want. But don’t talk to me during these two hours. So they batch their interruptions and their distractions into that one time my wife and I, we used to text each other all day long. And now we put it in a shared note in our iPhone. So then when we have lunch together, whatever, then all that stuff’s there. So you can batch your interruptions and you do well. So that’s it in a nutshell. So you think 30 minute hour think day before vacation mode, PDF, plan, Delegate focus. And the other thing, kind of the overriding thing that happens on the day before vacation. That’s so powerful in time management is you release your inner perfectionist, you release your inner perfectionist and Done is better than perfect. And you’re like, This has to get done. So if you can only get 80% on so be it. I’m going on vacation. Now you could put a nice reward at the end of the day to if you want but but anyway, that’s, that’s time management in a nutshell. I think there was only eight minutes.
Steve Fretzin [23:16]
Yeah, so time management, about time management. I think we just handle that. Right. So you’re practicing what you preach my friend. You’ve got a technique, and I believe you call it elegant, but it’s a technique to get results. And I wanted you to share that because I think it would be really helpful for people that are looking to get results with their law practices or anything they’re trying to accomplish. What’s the what’s that technique that I know, it’s, you know, it’s something it’s gonna be hard to kind of get into a few minutes, because we have about about just about 10 minutes and left. But
[23:48]
yeah, yeah, no problem. Um, so so there’s the technique. And so I was one of my bucket list items was to give a TEDx talk. And so a friend of mine nominated me I got to do it was a little nerve wracking. But anyway, in my TEDx talk, I talked about this concept called white tape, what you think about, you bring about this, that’s an acronym. YTV stands for what you think about, you bring about so it’s not just about thinking about which could be like the law of attraction, affirmations, it’s what you think about you bring about So you’re thinking about something but you’re taking action, right? You’re taking action on that. And in that talk, which I can I’ll share at the end. Now, if people want to get a copy of that talk, you can. But in that talk, I talk about this concept of why Teva and the idea that there’s a piece of your brain in the back called the reticular activating system. And it’s like the executive secretary, it’s the part of your brain that that feeds the conscious mind. What’s going on, right? So like, if it was telling you about your heart pumping, and you’re breathing and your blood chemistry and the pH of your blood and all the things it’s doing and all the hormones and things that you would go insane, right? So it decides what you get, but you can They kind of program it to say, give me give me these things, right? This is what I want. And so there’s a way to program that elegantly. And it’s with something that we talked about earlier a tool, and it’s called your cell phone or your smartphone. And so what it is, is I talk in there we have everybody actually do it during the TEDx talk, is we have you put as your unlock screen on your cell phone. Now, some people have pictures of their family, which is fine. So maybe the top half is your family. But the bottom half is, what is the thing that you want to bring about in your life, whatever that thing is, you put it on your phone, because the average person sees the unlock screen more than 100 times a day. Sometimes they now now consciously, you’ll see it when you first do it. But that’s okay. Even if like unconsciously you don’t see anymore, your subconscious mind is seeing it and feeding that little reticular activating system, which is now going to pop things into your conscious mind example that everyone can relate to is my son. His first car that he bought was an Acura maroon accurate to I didn’t even know what that car was. He sends me a picture dead. Here it is. He’s living in San Francisco area dead here it is. Because that’s, that’s cool. That’s a great car looks great. Then for the next two weeks or so, people are just pulling them up all around me. I park at the traffic light. There’s one there I see one over there. I see one over there. Why did they suddenly come all around me? Well, they didn’t. I was just my RAs was just tuned into that for about two weeks. I’m seeing him everywhere. So people realize, hey, when you buy a new car, you talk about something, all of a sudden you start seeing it everywhere. It was always there. But it was just what did you decide to focus on? And your brain is the same thing? It’s it’s what do you decide to focus on ends up literally creating your reality? So that lens you look through is really key.
Steve Fretzin [26:47]
But so give an example for a lawyer. So a lawyer is looking to hit a million dollars in in portable business or a lawyer is looking to build the law practice of her dreams. Okay? What is it about a new car, having a flashy new car that you want to buy? That represents success isn’t about having the number. Or there’s some examples that you have just so people can kind of figure out like, hey, if I’m going to do this on my phone, which I think is a super cool, great idea. What would be some examples?
[27:19]
Yeah. So so let’s talk about some examples of things that you want to bring about. Right? So it’s so for the attorney, what is it that you want to bring about, right? And so for some of them, it’s, you know, and I’ll give you real examples of people be home for dinner. Like that was their goal, like right now for the next month or two. And so their little unlock screen said, be home for dinner. And that was it. And they just wanted that to be that’s what they wanted in their rats. So they think about be home for dinner, be home for their another attorney, he figured out okay, if I file seven cases a week, I hit all my goals. So what do you want to bring about seven cases a week. So his unlock screen is seven cases. That could be a big number seven in cases. And he’s seen that all more time, every single day. But and it could be some people have used a car. One attorney, I had one attorney friend, this one it took two years, but he wanted to write a screenplay. So he, you know, had a picture of a screenplay. You know, I wrote and wrote on his phone, screenplay. And he contacted me, like two years later, and he says, I finished the screenplay, I can finally update my phone. Some of them were get out of the console room. That was another one was to have a million dollar practice, you know. But but but a lot of times, it’s what’s going to motivate you remember, goals are not to be like deadlines of disappointment. But what they’re there for is to motivate you to move forward to move towards your I call your point B, you go from point A to point B, where do you want to go? And that’s what you want to put on there to remind you, you know of that thing, but it’s very personal. And I think success is personal success to me is you’re moving towards where you want to go. I think you’re successful, no matter who you are, or what where you’re going. If you’re moving towards where you want to go, and you’re making progress. You’re a success and you’ll feel successful. And your brain, we’re just we’re just like walking pharmacies, your brain will produce the chemicals that give you the energy, the upbeat Ness, the positivity, the dopamine and serotonin is all that stuff. When you when you have progress towards your goal.
Steve Fretzin [29:17]
It’s almost a little bit like the saying and if this is Napoleon Hill, or where I heard this maybe from a Brian Tracy tape years ago, but you are what you think about most of the time. So people that are negative end up in a negative place not doing well. People that are positive generally end up in a more positive place. However, if you’re thinking about something specific, like you’re saying on your phone, that’s a great way to not just have to think about it but to because you’re seeing it all day long. Subconsciously, you know, you’re thinking about it. Yeah, and that’s, that’s, that’s why it’s kind of like an elegant, simple, elegant thing you can do. What’s your so right on the lens because
[29:53]
what happens is your as this little this little piece of your brain in the back of your skull there, it’s going to help you Find whatever you’re thinking about, right? So if you are looking for destruction, you will find it. And it’ll produce the brain chemicals of depression and data. But you know, all that stuff will happen. Right? So so that lens that you’re looking through is so very important. Now, some people will say, Steve, they’ll say, I’m thinking negative all the time. How can I do that? And so I’ll just give you one thing. Very simple. Another simple yet elegant. It’s just a two word phrase. Yeah. But so so when you hear when you start thinking negative, I want you to stop and say, Yeah, but so let’s, for example, I say, I don’t have enough time, you know, I don’t have enough time to build my law practice. Yeah, but and then let’s just pause for a second, let your brain out. Yeah. But you control your schedule, you control who we hire, you control how much we charge for case, you control this, you control, you could do this, you could plan better you could do next day planning, you can start using 30 minute hours. You know, your your brain will give you answers with the but and I like to Yeah, but other people when when I hear them arguing for the limitations, right? You hear them argue for the limitations? They’ll say, Well, you know, we could never start that new practice area. Yeah. But it just makes them think Well, yeah, but I could hire an attorney to do that. Or you know what, I can build it from a marketing standpoint. And then I could you refer out the cases or, you know, there’s, there’s lots of possibilities. Yeah,
Steve Fretzin [31:16]
just great stuff of land. I really appreciate it. We’re going to wrap things up with Game Changing book. And I think the game changing book is a book that you co authored with the Napoleon Hill, folks. And for those of you who don’t know, and we don’t, we don’t have a lot of time to get into the weeds on this. But the first sales book I ever read back in 1995, was Napoleon Hill’s book Thinking grow rich. You not only have your original copy what from college? Yeah. But then you went back and found an original version of the only 5000 that were created back from what the 30s Yeah, yep. back seven. So it’s, it’s one of the most interesting and positive books you’ll ever read. If you ever just want to pick up and read a really cool book, but you took it a different direction. So maybe just take let’s wrap things up with that.
[32:12]
Yeah, so So in college, one of the, you know, I talked about my son, the cold shoulder. Another moment of dawning comprehension, for me is I sent away for an audio tape I kind of a little, a lot of attorneys are seekers of knowledge. And I saw an audio tape for thinking grow rich, I’m dating myself this back in the 80s. But it was read by Earl Nightingale was an abridged version of thinking grow rich, and I listened to the tape. And that’s where I first thought, wait a second, what you think about you bring about and I read this book, I still have, it’s kind of marked up here. For those on the video back that anyway, I read this version. A lot of people read this version in college, I had some success, I met my wife, we’ve been married 30 years, I had some good jobs, I started my own business, I had some success. And then I went and I bought one of the original 5000 copies. Now, when I opened up the original 5000 copies on the very first page, it says, What do you want most? And you know, by that time, I’d read this other version, like 16 times I go, I never read that page. I never read that page. Yeah. And so I realized at that time that the instructions those there were two instructional pages, I realized those weren’t in there. And then as I studied the book, I realized it was different things were missing. You know, like one example, one thing that really stuck, I’m a Christian, and I was reading the book. And all of a sudden, in the original, he talks about Jesus, I’m like, Okay, I would have remembered that if it was in the other one. Yeah, but it was so so there’s a bunch of changes made a big difference in my reading of the book. So in the end, my favorite book is thinking Grow Rich book study edition. It’s hard to see there the green screen, but yeah, it book study edition, where I went back and I got the original because I couldn’t find it anywhere. So I wouldn’t gotten back effects. Similarly version of the original thinking grow rich. So it has he shouts a lot like all caps, he writes in all caps. So some of the, the language is a little dated. So that can be a little tricky to read in some parts, but I got the original. And then I’d written a guidebook for thinking were rich at that point, telling everybody about the loss pages and how to apply them. And then I did a book study, a bunch of books study. So now I put all those three books in the one book and that’s, that’s my favorite book I read every year, I’ve probably read about 70 times the book Thinking grow rich at this point. But but it’s got, you know, a guide book in there that’s got a little book study before and after each chapter. But that’s, that’s my favorite book. And, and even no matter what version you read energetically, there’s something about that book, the stories about people, you know, taking their thoughts and turning them into reality. It’s very inspiring, you will kind of resonate or vibrate at a higher level when reading, you know, and reading those books. And if you don’t, then maybe there are different versions, there are different versions, right, where people kind of rewrite it, you know, maybe specifically for different you know, for, you know, like updated times or something like that if you don’t like English and things like that, but but a really, really powerful book for
Steve Fretzin [34:59]
people. Awesome. And I mean it’s it’s just so cool and it’s so, you know, for me it’s you know as the first sales book I ever read or the self in you know, like self help book I ever read. Yeah, it just it really hits home and I’m now inspired to want to go back and grab a copy off my shelf and now wonder should I get your copy? And you know, maybe I’ll send me your address me Roger. So I’ll say, I’ll let me get it. I’ll get it on Amazon. I don’t like I’d like to support my Okay, but what
[35:24]
if it comes to me I give you a $2 bill bookmark, and I autograph it, which raises its value by $5 in garage sales, all right. autographed books $5 more per value there.
Steve Fretzin [35:34]
We’ll talk offline we’ll talk Blaine so great having you man just so chock full of knowledge and great tips for my audience so appreciate you people want to reach out to you to learn more about cell fluence and you and what you do. What are the best ways for them to get in touch?
[35:49]
You know, the simplest thing is just go to Blaine tedx.com. So BLAINET dx.com You can opt in there, get my a copy of my TED talk a transcription of it. And then we’ll be connected and so you’ll have my email happy to help you. I’ll send you some articles about results. Let’s get to know each other if I can help in any way I’d love to do it.
Steve Fretzin [36:08]
Yeah, and now we’ve got the the IP on helping teenagers with their time so that’s an offline kind of time that we’ve already got the idea and so if anybody’s listening socket you’re too late. We got it. So thanks again man. I just appreciate it appreciate you being here. All right, thank you
[36:27]
so much. And I’ll leave you with this the bad news The bad news is Time flies the good news. You’re the pilot. Oh love pilot well my attorney friends pilot with
Steve Fretzin [36:35]
deep so deep everybody. Hey, thank you for spending time with with Blaine tonight today. If you didn’t get some good takeaways, some good acronyms some good vibes from our show today. You’re sleeping in by the way if you’re if you’re listening to this while you’re driving, don’t sleep that’s just some general good tips there. But hopefully you had a good time listening to us and to Blaine and this show is you know all about helping you to be that lawyer someone who’s confident organized in a skilled Rainmaker. Be safe be well, we’ll talk again soon.
Narrator [37:07]
Thanks for listening to be that lawyer, life changing strategies and resources for growing a successful law practice. Visit Steve’s website fretzin.com For additional information, and to stay up to date on the latest legal business development and marketing trends. For more information and important links about today’s episode, check out today’s show notes